Finding Balance

Made it through the holidays and all was good. Hope the same is true for you. Seems that from Halloween to the New Year's Eve celebration life is such a rush. You look forward to the fall/winter holidays with such anticipation for all kinds of reasons; vacation from work, getting together with family, religious celebrations, great sporting events, maybe even a white Christmas. And then they are upon you and then they are gone.

And at the end of the year I always have this nagging pressure I place upon myself to evaluate what the past year has been, review where I think I am going during the next year, and figure out if I am on course to get there. It is never a very clean process, seems I am just too busy (or a bit too lazy) to really give it the time it deserves and needs. So it often lingers there, floating like a balloon in front of me that I can't quite get my hands hand on yet I keep walking towards.

I have ideas, notions, thoughts, etc. But part of me wants a detailed strategic plan with specific goals and an outline of how I am to achieve them. I get this done for some things but there always seems like there is so much more to do, particularly if I am feeling restless or uneasy and that there is something left undone that I need to address in my life. I always believe if I spent additional time reviewing it all, I could find greater clarity. But therein lies the rub, what does it mean to find clarity in life and how do we do it?

Not sure about you, but finding the level of clarity I want is something that has at times eluded me. Not on everything, some things are very obvious and we would need to be blind to miss them. But on other items, often more subtle yet still important, it can be very hard to obtain. I have come to realize that there is no big white board in the sky with all the answers written on it. No direct messages on the "bat phone" explaining the next decision I should make. So we do the best we can with what we have and then live with the results.

And this brings me back to balance. Not so much in the finding of balance in your life between all the things you do each day, but a recognition of the delicate balance we maintain in so many areas of our lives as we try to sort through what to do and when.

I do some morning readings to get me going and to think about things. They are randomly selected but still interesting and raise some good questions. But on one day I can get a reading that talks about patience, thoughtfulness, and being steady. Then a day later I get something about being bold, making decisions, and that the time to act is now. So how do I know when to do what? And the more I reflect on this it makes me realize how delicate some of these decisions we face are and how difficult choosing the right path (or window) can be. That life is a constant act of balancing these various tensions in our lives as we make our way.

We read all the time that the main ingredient for success is persistence and perseverance. That the fight goes to those who stay with it and never gives up. In business, the arts, whatever, if it is your passion stay true to yourself and stick with it and eventually it will come to you. Yet we also either know someone, or have experienced it ourselves, where they invest, they give, and they work at something but the "success" they want simply does not materialize. And eventually they reach a point that it is time to move on. They must find another path because life and the universe seem quite obviously to be going in a different direction and they either find the current/flow of things and go with it, or they get swallowed up and drown. But how do you know when to stick with it and when to toss it in? Not an easy decision to make, whether it be in regards to a relationship, a job, a lifelong dream, or a burning passion.

So wading through all of that and finding your path is not easy. Keeping all of this in balance and knowing when to turn the page and move on, or when to carry on the fight, can be difficult.

So my life historically (especially when I was younger : ) seemed to look a lot more like this picture of the old teeter totter ride. I would be the "husky" kid on the one side holding the other kid up in the air. Wanting to find a way to get up in the air and even to balance with someone. But it was often tough and rarely happened. So how do we find balance in these things?

I have no secret to share, no illuminating answer. I do know that when I have a plan and focus on the process and trust the process things usually work out ok (rather than just staring out over the horizon longingly for something). Steady tends to be good, but there are also moments in our lives where we don't get a lot of time to think about things and we have to act. So I try not to let fear limit my path, to trust the process, and to have the courage to do what I think is right and then to do it at the right time.

I have decided in 2018 to release all fear and doubt into the universe and to just say good bye to all of it. This month I turn 59. Seems hard to even believe but here it is. And at this point in my life I am mostly just grateful for all the people in my life, my health, and the freedom and opportunity to pursue the things in life I want to do. What a gift it all is. Seriously, what a freaking gift it all is!

So as much as I talk about finding the balance and walking this kind of tight rope, part of it all seems to be understanding and accepting that we are the ones who stretch out the rope and make it anxiety producing. And why do we do that? Not sure but it seems to be in our nature. So I have decided to just say no (do all of you remember Nancy Regan? : ). No to doubts, no to fears, no to any of the self-limiting bullshit we tell ourselves.

But this year I will say yes to passion and purpose and trust those things to guide me. This year I will live in a higher state of gratitude and I will build on the love and good friendships I have in my life. I will appreciate the small and wonderful gifts life and the universe offer me each day, like a gorgeous snow fall, a beautiful sunrise, the waves on a beach, or the view from the top of a mountain. And maybe even more than anything else the smiles of those I love.

May 2018 be a gift to all of you and may all of you find that balance as you sort through all that life has in store for you this year. And most of all, may each of us be able to see clearly the gifts life presents to us each day and give thanks. Many blessings........